Suddenly my salvation seemed to lead through the road of submission and it seemed to me that maybe what I’d wanted from Lexi was not her obedience to me, but her own engulfing presence, soaking me up, holding me inside herself. How else could I explain how low I’d sunk? What was I doing if not waiting for some mistress to come along and take hold of me? I discussed it with April. She was angel enough to listen to me discuss my own hurt. I wasn’t April’s first D/s partner. She’d had a virtual master online, a much older man she called Master K, and she’d done such things with him as were possible on computer. He’d been a switch—dom most of the time but he taught her how to dom him too. She hadn’t enjoyed that as much, but he’d taught her some tricks, she knew the idea. When I first told her I thought I might be a sub she just looked at me. ‘You, Russell? Oh no. No. No way you could be a sub. Not even a switch. You just don’t have it.’ ‘How do you know? You don’t know what I feel. I stop and said, “shit, I forgot the tennis rackets” and turn to go back to the car. Benny continued into the house, and when I get into the house, Benny is in the middle of the living room stark naked and harder than he was in the shower, if that was even possible !Seeing him naked and hard, got my dick to spring to full attention as well, and grow even harder when Benny said, “come over before I lose my nerve !” I strip off my clothes and kneel next to Benny, who grabs hold of my dick and starts to go down on me….he sucks in the head, and pulls off, looks up at me and says, “how do you do it ?” I said, “how the fuck should I know” but I was covering…I had sucked about 2 dozen cocks in my teen years…but I didn’t want to lead on that I was gay. He never waited for my answer, as he went down on my again as I was answering him. Each time he went down, he would suck it in deeper and deeper, until my dick was in as far as it could go in the sitting position I was in, so I laid.
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